Blogging Block

I don’t have that because even if I did I wouldn’t say it or write it out loud because then it could possibly self-actualize.  I’ve just been busy.  Yes.  Busy.  Very Busy.  Busy doing what?  I will tell you.

Last Thursday I had some excruciatingly painful gynecological procedures done by my friend’s sister (who happens to be a Gynecologist.)  The procedures involved an Endometrial Biopsy which appears (to my wife who was watching anyway) to resemble Liposuction of the Uterus.

I don’t recommend it, not even for the Vicodin you get.

And since she was already through my cervix and IN my uterus, she went ahead and put in that Mirena IUD, which will hopefully–no, will–eliminate my visits from Aunt Flo for the rest of my childbearing life.

On Friday– Kevin, The Guy Who Gets Bird’s Nests Out of Microwave Exhaust Vents came over to do just that job.  By Friday evening–the bird moved right back in.  HG cleaned out the nest again (because now I knew how to do it after watching Kevin) and by Sunday, that bird was back again.  So we went to the Homo Depot and bought a huge roll of wire to clog up the bird’s entrance to my house.  It only came in one size–a huge roll–so if anyone needs some wire, let me know, as I have enough for the entire free world’s microwave exhaust holes.

Saturday HG wanted to go to The Hotel Oregon in McMinnville.  They have a rooftop bar and since it was 117 degrees on Saturday, HG thought it would be a fun time to sit on a roof–in the sun.  Since I don’t burn and don’t need sunscreen, I agreed.  Unbeknownst  to us, The Hotel Oregon and the town of McMinnville is host to the annual UFO Festival which happened to be held–this past weekend.  Imagine our surprise when we were greeted by strange looking, strangely dressed UFO enthusiasts whilst we attempted to sip micro-brews and eat Cajun Tater Tots.

And I was without my camera.

Next year, I will be wearing a hat made of tin foil with my BIG FOOT LIVES t-shirt.  Go ahead and click here to get on their mailing list.  Come on, you know you want to.

On Sunday HG and I went to the Multnomah County Library to see our good, good friend LeLo in NoPo give a talk about blogging.  As per her usual–she was amazing and dynamic and articulate and interesting and of course lovely.  The fact that it was a beautiful, rare and sunny May day AND that she was competing with Barack Obama–she had a good turn out.  Afterward we went to LeLo and AdRi’s house for a wonderful BBQ and slushies!  AdRi is a fantastic grill-er and LeLo makes a mean slushie-it was the perfect end to a wonderful weekend.

This week?

I have mad deadlines for school, for work, and for home.  Preparing for a Big Lesbian Camping Trip this weekend, almost the end of my school term, and all that other stuff with kids and what not.

See, I don’t have Blogging Block–I’ve just been busy.

What? You didn’t have a Gay Thai man come over and cook you lunch this weekend?

Well, we did.

Our friend Ram (who is an amazing Thai Chef and owns his own restaurant) came over to our house on Saturday afternoon and cooked us lunch.

He made us amazing pot stickers.

Amazing curry.

Amazing noodles.

And amazing dessert, sticky rice and Mangos.
He also brought wine, which meant I was tired the rest of the day. I’m too old to drink in the middle of the day!

Wink really like Ram, but we didn’t give her any Thai food.

The rest of the day I caught up on my reading, the dogs sat by the fireplace,

and we just chilled.

Now that was a delightful Saturday.

Speaking of delightful.

My Internet BFF wrote a fab little piece in today’s Oregonian book section. Hop on over there and read it and tell her how amazing she is. I plan on telling her later this week while we lunch on pasta and sip red wine at Portland’s fanciest outdoor mall. We’ll both be wearing our Prada’s, so if you see us out dining, please stop by and say hello.

Tomorrow the RSG family will be dining with my world traveling friend LeLo. She has returned from her fabulous birthday vacation and we will be sadly giving her back her dog.

We love Wink.

We’re off to enjoy a rare but wonderful sunny March day, Happy Sunday everyone. Ciao.

If February 26th is Your Birthday

You may receive the answer to a heartfelt prayer within the next two weeks. Because Lady Luck and good fortune both smile on you, it is a great time to make important decisions and changes. Anything and anyone that comes to you now is probably beneficial. Through the first week of April, your popularity hits a peak–making this a good time to enter into commitments.
–Jeraldine Saunders, printed in today’s Oregonian.

Do you know anyone who’s birthday is today?

Do you know anyone who’s birthday is today, who is a blogger and a good, good friend of mine?

A blogger who is a “domestic goddess” of sorts who cooks amazing foods, cans stuff, bakes cupcakes, and makes mad fabulous aprons?

Who is on vacation right now in Cancun?

Who has a dog named Wink who eats muffins off of my dining room table, and hogs the bed when she comes to our house to stay? (The DOG, not the lady.)

Who’s alter ego is the Sassy Gardener?

Who is the wonderful, fabulous, beautiful and fantastic . . .

LeLo in NoPo!

Happy Birthday LeLo! Many happy more!

STOP THE PRESSES!

I’m not finished . . .

Do you know who else’s birthday it is today?

She’s another blogger, and another friend of mine, (although I have not yet had the pleasure of meeting her IRL.)

She’s the most fantastically amazing incredible photographer and I covet her talent (and her hair.)

She’s an RSG like me.

She loves Argyle Pinot Noir.

She needs to move to the Pacific NW sometime soon.

She may have a touch of OCD.

My wife wants her to be her next girlfriend because she washes the sheets every week.

She’s super stylish, loves the color red, wears a lot of black, is a converted Mac user and has amazing taste in everything.

She is the beautiful . . .

Fleur de Lisa!

Happy Birthday to you Lisa! Wishing you the best.

(No wonder I love both of these women so much, they’re twinsies!)

Thank You!

To all of you wonderful people who have expressed such very nice things to HG and I.  The commenters, and the lurkers, and my friends IRL.  You all rock, and I am eternally grateful for your friendship and support!

XOXOXOXOXOXO

RSG

More Good

Congratulations to everyone who became Domestically Partnered yesterday! Special wishes go out to my good friends, LeLo and AdRi! We are looking forward to celebrating with you very soon. . .

HG and I are waiting just a little while to register, not because we’re afraid of our rights being taken away, but because of HG’s work schedule. It will be great, I may even skip class that day.

Last night was a celebration that we were unable to attend, which was a bummer, but motherhood occasionally stands in the way of certain things I would like to do. Yesterday motherhood included a basketball game for DD#1, and my taking DD#2 and #3 to see the Hannah Montana movie.

What genius thought of that?

So not only does the girl sell out coliseum sized venues for upwards of $1000.00 a ticket, she then releases a 3D movie of the concert, charging $15.00 bucks a pop that only runs for a week and sells out every show. Pure marketing genius. I wish one of my kids was talented enough to exploit that way.

With the capitalistic, sarcastic comments out of the way, I will say this:

I was very pleasantly surprised at how much I enjoyed the show. The Hannah Montana part was good; the Miley Cyrus part was truly amazing. DD#1 pointed out to me, “Mommy, they’re the same person.” I realize this, but the music was different and her persona was very different. Miley’s music was edgy, rocky, interesting to listen to, her dancing was fab, and she had a little bit of sexiness that was not ewww, she’s a teenager and she’s being sexy (like Brittney at her age.) It was feminine and expressive with just a little something mixed in; a girl beginning to realize that she is in fact a sexual being. I may even download a few of the Miley songs that we don’t already have and burn a CD for my ride to school (a frightening concept for someone who was trying to figure out a way to not go to the show!) I think the young lady will do well–assuming she doesn’t get herself knocked up in the next few years. (That was sexist, she can’t get herself knocked up, some guy will have to participate, him being just as responsible.) Let’s just hope that doesn’t happen, for the guy’s sake for sure; that Billy Ray is kind of a big guy.

Ginger gets her tube out of her butt, and the cone off of her head today. This is a very good thing, as we are all pretty tired of her incessant whining. I do realize that she is probably uncomfortable, but we haven’t had any sleep for three nights, she can’t go outside by herself, she can’t sniff to go potty (the cone is in the way of her sniffing,) and she has to be carried up and down the stairs. It’s actually quite, quite pathetic. I’ll be happy when our fab lesbian vet gives us the thumbs up that she is fixed.

Our other dog, Abby, not so much.

Yesterday I talked to a trainer who will come to the house and do some “dog whisperer” type training with her. They guarantee their training for the life of the dog, which may not be very long if Abby continues to eat entire bottles of Xanex, nail polish, the girl’s stuffed animals, and HG’s toothbrushes. Frankly, we’re tired of buying toothbrushes and I really don’t think that my doctor is going to re-fill my prescription if I use the “really, my dog ate my Xanex” excuse. Uh huh. Sure.

The next step is convincing HG that this training is worth it; but I guess that will depend on what our toothbrush budget is next month.

Well, cheers everyone. I have about twenty five writing assignments to complete between my school and my freelance writing job, all that need started (hopefully completed) before a meeting I have today downtown.

May the Good keep on coming!

Random RSG

HG and I hosted a small dinner party last night with a blog friend and her lovely partner; it was fab and we had lots of fun, and I got to set my table all pretty like I enjoy, (sans chargers Woo…) I decided the chargers would be overkill since it was only two courses (plus delicious dessert brought and baked by said guests,) and it wasn’t a major holiday. So no chargers. But plenty of other dishes.

If you ever happen to get a zit on your lip. Don’t pick it to the point that an entire layer of skin comes off. This is not good and it hurts like hell when you put alcohol on it. BTW, the Burt’s Bee’s blemish medicine? The very first ingredient is alcohol, and not the kind you drink.

I love having company because it gets stuff that we have put off done in our house. Like the curtains in DD#1’s room that we’ve had since June, and the curtain in our room that we’ve had since February. And the picture in our bedroom that our BFF Neighbor Judy gave us. Yeah, they’re all hung up now. And the house is really clean, the yard is mowed, and the laundry is done. (Not that our guests would be looking for dirty laundry, but it’s done nonetheless.) And all of these tasks were completed by my lovely wife, whom I adore with all my heart.

It’s cold here. Damn cold. Like 68 degrees, I’m wearing a sweatshirt. WTF? When is summer arriving in the NW? I would like to know.

I read an intense blog post today. Go read it.

The writer. Amazing.

I’m looking into school programs. The problem with my looking into school programs is that I haven’t quite figured out what I want to be when I grow up. I know I can be anything I want and that I’m smart (IQ high enough for MENSA but they’re a bunch of dorks…) I know I’m capable and strong. I have good support and motivation. But what to do?

I’m leaning towards a photographer of some sort, a writer of some sort, or a funeral director.

How random is that?

For now, I will settle for my Glamorous Waitressing Job which I am now off to.

Happy Weekend.

It’s Day Two, and a Rant

And so far, I haven’t come apart at the seams. I did however forget about DD#1’s piano lesson and haven’t yet helped DD#3 study spelling words, (HG does that.) I also had trauma when American Express didn’t post my payment and sent me an e-mail stating I had an outrageous balance, not fun. Then I hit my knee so hard on the little control thing for my trailer hitch inside my car that I couldn’t breathe. (I also yelled at DD#1 and had a very near panic attack.)

But I’m putting that all behind me.

Good things abounding. Last night I finished a book I was reading which was light and cute and funny, (Shopaholic by Sophie Kinsella.) Today I dropped the girls off at their respective educational institutions, went to the market, came home, read up the house, dressed and made coffee. LeLo and Wink came for a visit, we almost won $20,000.00 playing scratch it’s, she gave me a nice Mac lesson and we had a lovely lunch surrounded by all sorts of scary suburban types. LeLo was a little frightened, but I held her hand the whole time. (Not literally people…)

I’ve also had the opportunity to have lovely e-mail chats with two of my readers and invitations from friends who feel sorry for me like me.

It’s all good.

Now, I have a rant.

I have taken ssue with some things I overheard on the Today show today.

Why are they making a big deal about women breastfeeding other women’s babies? Women have done that for millions of years without any issues. After all, human milk is made for human babies. People don’t have any problem feeding their baby milk that comes from a COW, but balk at feeding their baby milk that comes from another human? Please. Corporate pharmacuetical companies created negative propaganda about breastfeeding fifty years ago and generations of people have suffered the health consequences from that.

The bottom line in this “issue” is that our society has so sexualized women’s breasts and diminished a women’s power of birthing and breastfeeding that it has somehow now become “taboo” to do something that our bodies were designed to do. We have medicalized, intervened, and demeaned women’s bodies (in regards to mothering,) because that natural reproductive power that women posess is so fucking threatening to men; they took it away from us.

And how did they do it?

They dangled a false carrot of empowerment and freedom in front of us to make it look like they weren’t controlling us. They traded us the “burdon and restrictions” of birthing and breastfeeding for turning over our personal freedoms, choices and power and ultimately denying our natural God given instincts.

Women are routinely screened for HIV during pregnancy. I have other issues with this, that I won’t get into now, I’m just circumventing the HIV issue of sharing breast milk. There is nothing wrong with a healthy woman breastfeeding another healthy woman’s healthy baby. Nature intended babies to be fed human milk, and however a woman chooses or needs to achieve that, so be it.

End rant.

Lovely weekend

So nice having friends over. I adore cooking for people, especially when it allows me to wear this particular outfit.

LeLo said that it wasn’t very butch. . . What? Is? She? Thinking? That apron and the pearls are tres butch I believe.

Friends and Fun,

and a *little* Pinot Noir,

Very good times indeed!

Dinner Party Prep

I love having friends over for dinner, it’s really one of my most favorite things ever to do. So in preparation for this evenings events, I went shopping.

This is one example of why I should never be permitted to go to Costco alone,

HG doesn’t even know about this stuff, I carefully hid the cookies and chocolate covered pretzels in the top cupboard. The Photoshop? Well, remember I told y’all that I sold something I didn’t need anymore last week? Well, with some of that money, the Photoshop became mine.

Whenever I’m getting ready to begin cooking for a party, I like to set my table first. That way, I can be inspired.

An of course, Ginger needed some attention. After all, her sister is coming over this evening. So HG gave her a bath,

She was none too happy about it though.

And as a special bonus treat this afternoon, my girlfriend was on the Ellen show,

Okay, that’s not a good picture of my television, but you get my drift.

HG and I are looking forward to a lovely evening. I’m sure there will be more pictures, perhaps even Photoshopped ones!