Owls, Mice, My Mother and Now Me

My Mother has always been much of a night owl. I always used to wonder why she would stay up so late–doing things like laundry or rearranging furniture or baking late into the night while everyone else was sleeping. After being a mother for almost 14 Years I think I finally understand why.

I realize. Just at this moment as I sit here listening to the fifth load of laundry for the day drying in the drier and look at my semi-cleared desk, my pile of paid bills, my empty e-mail In box, my full e-mail Out box and assorted checks on my checklist exactly why my mother did stuff while everyone else was sleeping.

Because it’s the only Damn time you can get anything DONE!

And so I sit here and relish in the quiet sound of the laundry floating through the dryer and wonder why my mother didn’t clue me in sooner. Who needs sleep? Really.

Tomorrow we are heading out on Our Big Summer Camping Trip. We’ll be visiting Mount Rainier and Lake Wenatchee. I have prepared my Camping Meal Plan and I have all of the necessary check-lists in place. By about 3:00 a.m. I’ll be almost ready to go. Camping.

Yes, we are going camping again. Yes, this is like the 12th time we have gone this summer. Yes, I’m a Lezzie and that’s what Lezzie’s in Oregon do (along with hiking.) But, I won’t be hiking. I’ll be sitting on my ass reading a book. Lezzie’s do that from time to time as well. When they’re not chopping wood with their Big Axes or playing with their cats. Or taking their dogs to the Dog Park that is.

Speaking of Lezzies. The other day I met Melissa Lion for breakfast at a very fab little place in town. Not only did I have the best breakfast I believe I’ve ever had, but the Lezzies were everywhere. If you are single and live in Portland–skip The E. Room and go to breakfast. Seriously. But if you go–watch out for the dead mouse on the sidewalk–that part was gross and it didn’t look like a bird–not even a little bit. And if you’re at my house–also watch out for the dead mouses on the sidewalk. Two. I’ve found two. I scream and the neighbor comes to “dispose” of them. I’m phobic you know. Of mice. And clowns, and circuses. Which is why I had to decline The Shriners phone offer the other day to attend their circus. The lady said, “We don’t have any mice,” which I don’t completely believe but that’s besides the point because any circus, mice or not is Not Okay.

But dead mice? We don’t have a cat and somehow dead mice are all around me–it’s An Omen I think. Of what, I’m not sure but it must be a Good Omen. It has to be a Good Omen.

Only Good things happen in the summer.

When we return from Our Big Summer Camping Trip I need to put my “nose to the grindstone” so to speak. I don’t think anyone would actually want to grind their nose with a stone so I’m not sure why anyone says that–but I need to get busy. I have Projects. Lots of Projects. And family visiting all month long. Family from Long Ago and Far Away. I’ll need all the help I can get. Mice need not apply.

Laundry’s dry. I’ll be back. Unless Big Foot gets me while I’m (not) hiking.

Cheerio Bubbaloo.

Blog Broke

My Blog was broken. I upgraded to the new version of Wordpress and stuff disappeared. It’s fixed now but I lost a bunch of comments. The nice lady at Hosting Matters fixed it for me (as usual.) I heart the Help Desk.

Un-Plugged

At BlogHer08 we listened to a lady from Redbook Magazine speak. She announced that Redbook Magazine does not have a big following in Oregon and Washington. She said, “I don’t know why they don’t like us, I guess they’re too busy hiking.”

So because I’m a VERY GOOD OREGONIAN LESBIAN. I’m off to go hiking. I’m unplugging-not-taking-my-laptop and going hiking (and camping.) I’ll be bringing books (not Redbook Magazine.) I’ll catch y’all on Tuesday! Be good.

BlogHer08 Wrap Up

Yes, I could have gone with a photo from the conference. But Why? When will you ever see a picture like this again? Only if you visit the Castro in San Francisco. And that wasn’t the only weird thing LeLo and I saw in San Francisco, and I’m not talking about the queers.

We saw people dressed like bunnies and plastic butt sex toys, Bears wearing Tiaras and that was nothing compared to the BlogHer08 conference.

You think gay boys have drama?

Oh, they got nothing on the drama that 1,000 women bloggers gathered together can invoke.

Nothing.

BlogHer 2008 San Francisco!

Or better and more fondly known as the weekend I felt up a straight girl in the make-up department in Macy’s, walked 17 miles through the streets of San Francisco in heels (tipsy) and brought another straight girl back to my hotel room–to then not remember her name in the morning.

Ahhh. Blogger Conferences. To know them is to love them.

Saturday was a great day–very informative, interesting and lovely. We met some amazing people, socialized, ate, socialized, went to Break-Outs, socialized. I attended the session “Coming Out on Your Blog” which hello? I’m kind of an expert on. The live blogging from that session is here. I have to say that I found the session just a tad bit confusing. The panel members were there as apparent bloggers who were open on their blog–but when they were asked questions they revealed a very different circumstance. They spoke of hiding their blogs from family members and employers, blocking IP’s when they found out someone they knew was reading, using aliases, and having private, user-only blogs for revealing personal information. If all of that is “Coming Out” on your blog–I’d hate to see what “Blogging in the Closet” is about.

I gave a comment. I revealed that when I started writing RSG I was quite secretive about it. I used an alias (RSG) i used aliases for my children (I still do) I’ve never said what town I live in but still a whole variety of people have found this site.

My Mother, My Ex-Husband, His Friends, Old Friends from High School, and My Wife’s Ex-Girlfriend. I’m sure there is a whole host of people who have probably read and not said anything. “Hi there! Don’t be shy, I know you’re reading, welcome one and all, gay and straight, and all the people that HG and I have slept with!!!”

For me I got to a place in my Blogging Life quite a while ago where I just decided to live my truth. It’s how I live my Real Life and it’s how I live my Online Life. I’ve stopped keeping my identity private and have slowly merged my online life with real life in most ways. The Internet is only a scary place if you are involved with scary things. There are no boogy-men lurking around every corner–I’ve been blogging a long time and have never met a weirdo. Hell, there are weirder people living in the Scary Suburbs and way more dangerous.

But I digress.

Later, LeLo and I went to the Queer Blogger Meet-Up and let me tell all of you Queer Bloggers out there in the Blogosphere who may have missed it–

You didn’t miss anything.

It was the most bizzarre experience of my entire weekend and up there with one of the most uncomfortable 20 minutes of my life (I didn’t stay through the end–I HAD to leave.) It was not about meeting other Queer Bloggers at BlogHer–it was about listening to the group moderator and her partner talk about themselves, their life, their blogs, the state of their “closet”, how they are NOT getting married in California. She also asked if we thought the lesbian blogs on BlogHer should be written as to “not offend the straight people.” I said that straight people offend me every single day so, uh—No. It was weird. And not in a Queer way.

So then we went to the Final Keynote which I mentioned in my most previous post. Since that time I got a little more gossip information and have fallen in love with Jenny, The Blogess just a little bit for standing up to the High and Mighty Dooce and all of her Six Foot Amazon-ness. I think this blogger says everything I would like to say. Dooce can suck it. Except that she’s too tall. She’d have to bend over. And just because I just can’t let this die just yet, (you should SEE my stat-counter for people searching for this stuff) I must re-print (with my permission) Melissa Lion’s comment to a “Dooche Defender” named Anna who accused me and everyone else who doesn’t care for Dooce “jealous” because Dooche makes money at blogging.

Anna, so when someone makes a lot of money doing something, then they’re entitled to treat people like shit? And we should all check out reactions to her behaving like a douchebag because she makes a lot of money at it? Or because she’s some sort of pioneer of blogging about the minutia of her personal life as a bourgeois basket case who has no ability to recognize how good she has it and instead shits on the very people who make it possible? We, as bloggers, owe her something, is that right? How much do we owe? Because it seems like she’s taking all she can and then some.

Did I mention I also took in a session about Positive Posting? I did, and I loved it and yes I know that wasn’t the most positive thing but It Needed To Be Said.

Okay I’m finished.

Speaking of Boobs.

Whilst at the BlogHer08 Conference I had my make-up did by the Bare Escentuals ladies from Macy’s and because she was hot the make-up is really good for your skin I bought it. All of it. I had to pick it up later that night at our Farewell Cocktail Party at the store. Have you ever been to the Macy’s in San Francisco? It’s like the size of my home-town. Our party was a “progressive party” but not Progressive like Progressive. It meant it moved or “progressed” from place to place. We partied in the shoe and pantyhose department, in the lingerie department and in the furniture department. I hung out with this lady. We got into a little trouble together (when we weren’t looking for the bathroom that is.) We licked the legs of mannequins, sniffed panties, and got in a confrontation with the K-Y Jelly Lady about their gender specific lube. I wanted to know if HG and I used this lube, which one of us was to be the guy? It was a fair question I thought.

The K-Y Jelly Lady was not amused. LeLo’s Photos of the event are here.

I also held a $750.00 shoe. WHO buys shoes that are $750.00?

Back to the Boobs.

So after the party, I ran down to the cosmetic section after accosting Tricia to accompany me to retrieve my two thousand dollars worth of Bare Escentuals. While waiting I noticed the lady in front of me. Well, actually I noticed her earlier in the evening. Most especially I noticed her boobs. They were fantastic. So I told her so. (Open bar you know.)

She replied, “Thanks! I had them done.”

“Wow,” I said, “They are fabulous.” Pause. “If it wasn’t rude, I’d ask to feel them.”

“GO AHEAD!” she said

I look at Tricia.

She raises her eyebrows and gives me that nod because you know that secretly she wanted to feel them but was too chicken (of her wife killing her.)

So I did.

Feel them.

They really were amazing.

Mommy Bloggers=H. O. T.

Later we met up with Fivestar and another Mommy Blogger et. al to go out to Martuni’s for a cocktail or two. Can I just tell you that I had the most delicious Lemondrop made with Blueberry Vodka I have ever had? It was heaven.

After Martuni’s we went to a very classy place for breakfast where the above mentioned Mommy Blogger realized that she was not going to make her train to get home. We offered for her to stay with us in our hotel room. I had to talk to her husband Brad on the phone to assure him that I was not a serial killer–just a crazy drunk lesbian. For some reason–Brad was okay with this?

Upon leaving the restaurant we couldn’t find a cab so we did the only reasonable thing and WALKED to our hotel.

17 miles.

I was wearing heels.

LeLo was wearing heels.

It wasn’t pretty.

Tricia, who is the nicest person in the entire planet took off her shoes and gave them to LeLo who was getting blisters on the bottom of her feet. Tricia. Walked. Barefoot. Through the streets of San Francisco.

We will be erecting a statue in her honor at the next conference.

When we returned to our hotel room. I slept with a straight girl. A Mommy-Blogger-Straight-Girl. In San Francisco.

Albeit only sleep. It still sounds good. In a dirty kind of way.

The next morning I couldn’t remember her name, but I have on good authority she couldn’t remember mine either. She did offer me money the next morning. I’m not really sure why because I took a Trazedone that night before going to bed. I declined, but definitely considered it for a moment–and wondered what I did to deserve it.

On Sunday, LeLo and I had free time before going to the airport so we explored a bit. It was super fun and I have photos to prove it here.

Since returning home I have been slowly recovering.

Very slowly.

Categorizing all the information and storing it away. Visiting the sites of my new friends and already thinking about next year’s conference.

I really, really, REALLY think that Limpy needs to join us.

Yes, I am holding Two Cocktails

And that is the beauty of cocktail parties when you have nothing to do but have fun and talk to people and don’t have to drive anywhere!

I am presently sitting in the Keynote listening to the uber-famous bloggers (that I don’t happen to read.) LeLo and I are having a great time–we’ve met some nice people and I had my make-up did and tonight we are going to a cocktail party at Macy’s and then out on the town. A young hot lezzie blogger is taking us out tonight and I won’t get in any trouble because HG told me I had to Be Good–and I always obey everything that HG tells me.

So some drama occurred at the Keynote. Dooce is speaking (I will not hyperlink her, nope) and tells of a blogger, The Bloggess who called her (Dooce) a mythical hobbit in a post the other day–fully well knowing that the blogger would be here at the conference tonight.  Oh, The Drama at BlogHer 2008. Well before anyone knew it, the blogger she spoke of was standing waiting for the mike to tell Dooce that it was her who wrote the post. And she was standing BEHIND me. So I did the logical-bloggy thing and took her photo with Photo Booth as all the drama unfolded.

Let’s just say that there was a tad bit of tension in that room of over 1000 bloggers. After I got all the information –I have to say that I give The Bloggess a lot of credit for standing up and calling Dooce out on what she said about her.

Live and immediate Blogger Drama. From BlogHer 2008 in San Francisco!

It’s a Blogger Mecca

LeLo and I are in San Francisco at the Westin St. Francis Hotel. Such a lovely place. We have a lovely room and are surrounded by a million women bloggers.

Highlights so far:

• Our flight was delayed due to fog. Fog? In San Francisco? Who knew.
• We had Jone’s Cream Soda on the plane.
• Almost no traffic on the ride from the airport to the hotel.
• We’ve quickly discerned that we have to have a spiel of what we blog about. Hmmm. We’re trying to come up with the best description of who we are in ten seconds or less. Suggestions are welcome.
• I met Anna Post–great granddaughter of Emily Post. Hello? She was charming and engaging and fabulous. She gave me a book. I want to go back and see her again tomorrow. I might love her

Presently (at this very moment) we are sitting in a Writer’s Session. LeLo is taking notes so I can be lazy. I promised to take notes next time. As we are listening to the speaker and LeLo is taking notes–we are i-chatting to each other and Twittering at the same time. How cool are we? Oh yes, very. We are very high tech-multi-tasking-cool-blogging-divas.

More BlogHer 2008 San Francisco stuff later.

Ciao.

BlogHer San Francisco 2008!

Oh, the quiet of this blog. I have been working on a complicated blog post that I put aside because of the busyness of my life.

Busy stuff.

I’ve had meetings and teleconferences and shopping and writing and working and cooking.

Busy, busy!

I’m on a Summer Salad kick. Last night I made an amazing Cous-Cous salad with fresh basil, baby grape tomatoes, Feta, pine-nuts, green onions and Goddess dressing. We enjoyed it with some Dry Rose and listened to Reggae at an outdoor concert. Summer  bliss. Busy summer bliss.

And tomorrow? Tomorrow LeLo and I are jet-setting off to San Francisco to attend BlogHer 2008!

I’m so excited I could (insert cliche phrase here.)

I’ll catch up with some live blogging from the conference!

Letting go of old stuff

We had a garage sale this weekend and it was 135 degrees. Okay, 95–but that’s still damn hot.

Yesterday the garage sale was not so busy–today was much better and overall we made a little money for our garden fund and got rid of so much stuff. I got a little heat sick so we put everything out in BFF Neighbor Judy’s driveway and put an ad on Craigslist for people to come over and pick up what they wanted for free. The rest we will Freecycle or Goodwill.

Letting go of old stuff is such a cleansing and wonderful thing to do. When you let go of old stuff good stuff comes in. Good friends, good opportunities, good people, good feelings, good love.

There once was a time that I wasn’t valued and wasn’t cherished. I lived in a home for many years, raising a family and constantly trying to be good at everything I did. Every good thing I did was either not received, received negatively or received with sarcasm, joking, or invalidation. I was so empty.

I let go of old stuff and good stuff replaced it.

Last night HG and I were out enjoying some appetizers and drinks at a beautiful restaurant on a lake. We talked about things going on in our lives and just enjoyed each other. She takes such good care of me all of the time–she never makes me feel “less-than” because I’m not working full time or contributing financially as much as I did when I was working more. She is always sure to say that everything in our life is “ours.” I always try to tell her how much I appreciate everything she does for me and for our family.

“Thank you for taking such good care of me,” I told her, “You give me so much.”

HG held my hand and looked at me and said, “I could give you $100,000 a day and it wouldn’t come close to what you give to me every single day.”

And that my friends. Is some very good stuff.

Busy Bees

I love bees, I would like to have some bees but my oldest daughter is terr-i-fied of them. We can’t even eat dinner outside for fear of a killer bee attack. I remember when I was pregnant with her I was on a picnic with her father and the bees were especially aggressive–they wanted by sandwich and bad. I was watching them pulling pieces of lettuce out of the sandwich and flying away. I wonder if that is why she’s so afraid? Probably not.

I’m procrastinating. I’m a busy bee today, getting ready for a Garage Sale tomorrow. Why am I torturing myself like this? Because I think my wife was about to rent one of those dumpster things to get rid of stuff and I can’t let her break her environmental commitment. A Garage Sale is the perfect compromise–our house is rid of clutter–my stuff is recycled to someone who loves it–I get money to buy more plants and flowers for my growing garden–I attract bees–and all is well in the world (we won’t tell DD#1 about the bees part.)

Tonight we are dining with my friend SMB and then watching him perform in Les Miserables at The Broadway Rose Theatre. I hear the tickets have been selling like crazy so if anyone out there wants to go, jump to it. SMB said that he can take the girls back-stage, so they are thrilled. We can’t wait.

Tomorrow’s home school lesson is about capitalism and recycling. The girls will be having a drink stand and I will be invoicing them for their products–after the sale they can calculate their overhead and profits. I’m wondering if I should charge them rent for the space?

Busy Bee flying away~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~!

I’m on a good path

We returned from our 4th of July Camping Trip without incident.

I’m having such a great summer and such a great life. The girls and I have spent a lot of quality time together and I feel so lucky to be on the path that I am traveling right now.

My one online class I was taking for summer term was not going so well. I was having a hard time connecting the material to the teacher’s lecture and her assignments (which were incredibly stupid.)  Melissa Lion helped me with an assignment that I received a 67% on. It wasn’t my fault–or Melissa’s. The assignment was dumb–stupid dumb. Really dumb. I have only received one grade lower than an A since returning to Higher Education and that was a B. Melissa and I got a D and since we are both way too fabulous for a D–I dropped the class like a bad husband–and I have experience in that. This dropping, however, I did sooner rather than later–which is always a good thing because it means I’m learning to let bad things go instead of hanging onto them for too long.

Yesterday when I told HG that I had to drop the class–she said she supported my decision. “The last thing I want is for you to be stressed out,” she told me. I filled her in on the things I thought that I could do to be more productive–like work on my book proposal, work on my new Camping Blog/Guide, and start wrapping my brain around a new voice for a new project in the works. “You’re productive just taking care of this family,” she said. Hearing her say that, I jumped on her lap and kissed and hugged her. It feels so good to be validated for the work that I do at home, writing and taking care of our family–”thank you for letting me be a wife and a mom,” I told her. She amazes me every day and takes such good care of us–she is a blessing and a jewel in my life.

The path on which I am traveling is growing every day–there are some good things up ahead for me both personally and professionally and I am anxiously being patient to get to them. Along the way I am going to enjoy everything I see from my path–all very beautiful happy things–that are growing in my life and take a lot of quiet moments to be with them.

And I will wait to see what else I discover on my journey.